Chapter Three
At the end of the day, the double date was cancelled - Kayla called Isaac and told him she wasn’t feeling well. I was only glad to be alone with Enid that evening, the evening of my birthday. I wanted to spend it the most pleasant way, before the most magic day in the year for me will fade away like a distant memory of the past. I went to her place, glad to know her parents weren't home - I already went through the third degree investigation with her parents, but they still seemed to have many questions to ask me about my school achievements, about my hobbies, about whatever. And all I wanted was Enid in some flowerish dress, one of the many she had hanging in her closet, I wanted her on her bed, and me with her, talking and kissing. That's the perfect way, in my opinion, to end a birthday.
Enid whispered in my ear that she thought about continuing what we'd started in the woods; I had no reason to object. It seemed like all she had in mind that day was tempt me and seduce me. She looked me in the eye for long, long moments, before sliding her dress down her body, standing in front of me almost naked, wearing only a white lace bra and panties, looking every inch of her body virginal yet incredibly sexy, to the point where it almost drove me insane. She smiled at me and lay down on her bed, inviting me with the look in her eyes and the smile on her lips do the same, and I did. I was hypnotized by the silence in the house, by the sight of the almost completely naked Enid, by her angelic and devilish at once features, by my own wanting her, by her lips mouthing the words - "I love you", it was like floating on a cloud in the river of pink water - something so unreal and yet, so agonizingly pleasuring… I lay down beside her, and she took a strand of my hair and twisted it between her small fingers. She was petite, but that turned me on so much… Usually. Now I looked at her and tried to remember all those feelings I had the last time I imagined her like this, the last time I had a dream about her. But when the reality was there, it was somewhat, frighteningly different. Still, when we kissed, I thought I died and went to heaven, as much of a cliche it was. I wanted to control myself, to not go further than I knew she was ready to, but I had a hard time to actually draw the line after which I usually have to roll away from her and breathe and say, "that's it - no more." Somehow, I did. What amazed me was, that Enid looked at me with that look in her eyes she has every time we make out - the look with the half-closed eyes, when her long eyelashes shadow the vision of those beautiful eyes, with her mouth slightly rounded and wet from my kisses, with cheeks colored light pink and a breath slightly heavy from the excitement - and then she whispered, so quietly I nearly misheard her: "Why did you stop?" I looked at her, trying to remember every line of her face and figure as she said it again, expecting an answer from me. I - no, it wasn't possible. She couldn't be wanting more - more would be too close to going all the way, and as much as I longed for it, just like every fifteen year old wants it when he has a girlfriend as amazing as mine, the girlfriend was always the one who drew the line, and I never put any pressure on her. Her presence in my life was so more important to me than all the sex in the world. "What do you mean," I answered, hoping and yet afraid to hear her answer.
"I mean, don't you want to continue?" she said, arousingly running her fingers on my chest, saying with her sight that she indeed wanted to.
"Baby, you know me… yeah… but… you…" She was making me slide down to the condition where I cannot even think clearly because I want her so much; she had been warned about it before, but this time, she did it on purpose. My little angelic devil.
"I want it…" she whispered oh-so quietly in my ear, then jokingly, bit it. Then we both knew the battle with common sense - we've lost it, and the sweet blurriness of sexual desires and teenage lust owned us now, making us follow her crazy rules.
"What do you mean - want it?" I wanted to be sure, the last second before I lose it and become active only with one part of my body, and that wasn't the brain. I wanted to be sure she won't regret any single moment of what was ahead of us, she won't do it because of me, she'll do it for her.
"I mean, I'm ready… But I was saving it for your birthday… This is my present to you, I know you really want it…" She was blushing now, when saying those words of offering for the very first time.
Normally, I would have literally jumped on the offer and we would have made love, passionately and lustfully, but today… I wasn't myself in some weird, twisted way. I kept hearing those words, "today is the first day of the rest of your life", and I didn't know why. Usually, those are said when something so huge or unusual happens, it changes your life forever and this is why it's called, "the rest of your life" - because this rest is not like the past - that is what I heard, anyway. But nothing happened today, except this weird incident in the woods.
"Originally, this was to happen this morning in the woods, it would have been so romantic, under the blue sky on a blue blanket, but this guy walked in on us," she explained me the matter with the blanket in the woods.
Maybe that is what is so unusual in this day, the fact I was going to make love for the very first time… But… And here comes the but, so big I cannot ignore it and sink into Enid's sweetness. But. But maybe, this guy who walked in on us and prevented our loss of virginity was also fate, sent to us for all of this not happen. Maybe it wasn't right. And maybe that is why I kept hearing the words in his voice, even though I never heard him saying it.
"Enid… not today. Not now." Did I really say it? Was it my own voice, refusing? But it felt so right and natural to pronounce those words I never doubted it. Her face expression changed; she was wondering and questioning. "I… Somehow, I don't quite feel right to do it now."
"That's okay. Really. I'm not in a hurry," she said quickly.
"But you know… I'd really like to do it, just some other time."
"Yeah, sure. When we both ready, not just me. I mean, you almost fainted today… Do you feel all right now?" Enid the seducing woman disappeared, her place filled the usual Enid, the one who cares for you endlessly, the one who, in the future days, would probably make a wonderful mother.
"Yes, don't worry."
We lay one beside another for a long time, darkness slowly falling on the house as the time slid by, not saying a word, only exchanging glances every once in a while and smiling. After a while, I started feeling awkwardness. I felt the need to get out. It's not like I wasn't feeling comfortable with her, but there was something that drew me to… Where? If I walked out now, and allowed my feet to carry me to the direction they wanted to go, where would that be and who would be waiting for me there?